Most of us all have this defining moment or series of moment in our childhood, they let us to believe who we are today. We constantly replay them in our minds, repeating the negative comments over and over again, we start to believe it about ourselves.
Mine was moments of verbal abuse from my father. As a little girl, my father told me I would amount to nothing, my father told me I was worthless. My father told me I was ugly and dumb and that no guy would ever want to be with me.
Do you know what happened? I believed all that my entire life. I let the negative comments define me. I let my father define me. So I never tried, because I knew I’d always fail at whatever it was. I had no confidence in myself, I didn’t know how to gain it. I felt like I was living for someone else, not for me.
I wanted to be a lawyer. I wanted to be in politics. I wanted to make a difference. But people told me that it’s too much, it’s not for me that I should go into nursing instead because I had compassion for others. I did neither.
10 years later I look back on my life decisions, the decisions that I didn’t really make for myself and I realized it’s okay. God has a plan for me. I can still make a difference but with Jesus, not with laws and regulation. My compassion is still there striving, never skipping a beat.
If I had to go through those times of negativity, to become who God called me to be, then I am okay with that. My life isn’t perfect, but I wouldn’t change it. I want to be a living testimony of how God can use a broken little girl, to make a difference in this world.
People are people, they can’t define you. Don’t let them win. God created you, He is the only one that can define you. You are to be part of His kingdom. You are worthy of everything. You are a daughter or son of the King. Live like you are, not by the moments you like dwell in.
One thought on “Defining Moments”
I experienced verbal abuse in childhood. I can relate to your post. Thank you for sharing your story. God is using you.